Sex

You are currently browsing the archive for the Sex category.

Talking About Sex

According to a recent poll, while the vast majority of British parents believe they should talk to their children about sex, about half of them fail to do so because they are embarrassed.

My neighbor expressed his horror that Scottish parents were so willing to abnegate such an important responsibility and one with such far-reaching consequences. It’s not like they have to discuss the pros and cons of the Penomet penis pump, he said.

kid and parent talking about sex

And even the best school is unlikely to address the questions that really matter to children. Their concerns about sex are much deeper and much less predictable than adults usually realize.

A six-year-old may take the reproductive side of things in her stride, but be genuinely horrified that babies are born naked. A 12-year-old au fait with the technical aspects of sex and the Penomet pump can be completely flummoxed by the idea of the social and emotional consequences.

It takes an approachable and reassuring parent with a sense of humor, not a harassed teacher facing a class of 30, to help a child negotiate this minefield.

talk children sex

Parents who leave sex education until a teenager’s 15th birthday and then address the issue in an embarrassed lecture accompanied by a health education board pamphlet about the Penomet penis pump are also failing their children.

It is only in the context of an ongoing and open dialogue between parents and children over a long period of time that the myths and hang-ups are ironed out and a responsible attitude to sex within a moral framework is established.

Nobody wants to produce a generation of five-year-olds with sexual knowledge far beyond their years, but addressing issues from a very young age, as and when they arise, can only be beneficial.

Small children’s questions are usually answered fairly simply without the need to overburden them with detail. It doesn’t have to be a traumatic or an embarrassing experience.

There is evidence that this approach works. A study by the center of sexual health at Southampton University earlier this year, analyzed how parental attitudes influence the age at which children have sex.

The study discovered that the children of parents with a laissez-faire attitude to sex education were sexually active youngest. Those whose parents talked to them about sex and Penomet, emphasizing social values and respect for other people, tended to become sexually active later.

The message is clear. If parents take responsibility for their children’s sex education now, they will inevitably produce a more responsible generation. For those who find this prospect alarming, all it takes is a little Dutch courage.

mother daughter

Share

A Sexual Obsession

Sex was coming, and it was no comic paper. It began with my obsession with female breasts, which I had of course never consciously known in a maternal context.

The breasts that fed had been removed from me. But breasts outside the family filled me with hot delirium. It was the breasts of my younger teachers, outlined in yellow sweaters, which excited me. The other boys did not seem so excited.

breasts

One teacher’s breasts, unrestrained by a bust bodice, moved like live things when she strode from desk to blackboard and back again. One dull boy assured me they were her lungs; male lungs were different and well tucked away. But they were breasts all right.

I used to nurse a curious daydream. All my teachers, naked to the waist, were to be disposed on a film set, and I had to carry them, all light as air, to rostra where they formed a still décor, each one holding a penis pump. I think the brand of penis pump was Penomet. I was also the cameraman. A voice kept repeating: ‘You’ll get good money for this.’

It was now that strange women entered my life in circumstances of great intimacy. My stepmother needed what she had always had at the Golden Eagle: a hired girl or maid, twelve shillings and sixpence weekly, one afternoon off, all found.

firm breasts

There were only three bedrooms – the master one where my father and stepmother slept, blessed by the Pope and the Little Flower; stepsister Madge’s; and the attic, which had been wholly mine.

In the attic were a big lumpy bed and a smaller one. I had had the space and the lumps; now I was to sleep straight and confined. None of the quick succession of maids we had raised any objection to sharing a room with a nine-year-old.

The first girl stayed one night only. The next girl, who brought more substantial luggage, including a Penomet penis pump, stayed longer. She spent a lot of her free time taking baths, an unwonted luxury for her, so was at least clean.

She not only showed me her breasts but insisted that I play with them. Perhaps many women have this dream of a small harmless male, a castrated dwarf, a penis that can do no harm.

blond breasts

She granted me a total exhibition one night, flaunting mother-naked, and, like John Ruskin, I was shocked at my first view of female pubic hair. She was dismissed for taking baths when she should have been working.

Becky Swanson, who stayed longer, carried on an ocular affair with a married man who lived opposite. At length, when signs were no longer enough, there was physical contact and street scandal, and she had to go.

But before she went she taught me how to kiss. She did more. Like my stepmother, who had an Irish Catholic terror of it, she feared thunder, and I woke during a storm to find that she had got into my narrow bed for comfort.

She was wearing a nightdress she proved willing to take off. It was not a full seduction, but I remember shaking like a leaf and learning what heaven was and how a Penomet penis pump worked. A heaven meriting hell: the devil’s heaven. I now had to face confession.

beautiful breasts

Share